For the past three years, I spent much of my time commuting back and forth to The College at Brockport, studying journalism and sociology. And on May 14, I tuned into my virtual senior toast, an anticlimactic end to my senior year.
COVID-19 changed the trajectory of so many lives. For me, this meant learning to adapt to remote learning and reporting, not fully saying goodbye to my peers or professors and, at times, feeling as if these past three years didn’t exist. When something as important as a commencement ceremony is postponed indefinitely, it feels like your accomplishments don’t matter, that all of the good and trying times were fleeting memories at an accelerated rate. It doesn’t feel real to say I’ve officially graduated, as if time is at a standstill and moving way too fast simultaneously.
I’ve tried to come to terms with what this situation has meant to me and what has been affected for me specifically, and I believe I have to some extent.
I was lucky enough to begin my undergraduate career with multiple credits, allowing me to graduate early. Oddly enough, I didn’t feel like part of the Brockport community until three semesters in – when I joined The Stylus, which is the college’s student-run newspaper. This makes graduating during a pandemic and stay-at-home orders even more bittersweet. I had found my place on campus, finally, yet I didn’t get to stick it out until the very end.
I never bought into the belief that college is “the best time of your life,” but I have realized it never had to be. It was special and an opportunity to grow, to fail before succeeding, to make friends that may or may not last. Because college is supposed to be a time where you know nothing yet everything all at once, where we all stress about not knowing enough or knowing too much.
My last memory on campus was being alone at the college’s student-run newspaper The Stylus, clearing out the office our managing editor and I had made our second home for the semester. At that point, I don’t think I truly grasped what was happening. I know a part of me had hoped it was all a vivid dream, that after spring break I’d be back in that tiny office space working on layouts and headlines. The Stylus was my home away from home, and I miss spending my Mondays with so many wonderful people.
As I trek on into post-graduation life, I realize we all must navigate what this pandemic has left for us, for everyone. I can’t be sure what this world has in store for us once this pandemic is over, but I know we will come back stronger than before. I’ve always heard my generation is incredibly resilient, and after everything we’ve collectively been through, I would say that’s pretty accurate. And while we may have lost the traditional version of my senior year, the ways we’ve been able to rally together from a distance is pretty cool, too.
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